Going to be in HK from 11 – 15 Aug. It’s Summer sale there and typhoon season.
Any tips on to do, to see places?
Do you automatically think “I’m useless” if you do something wrong, or assume that if your neighbour ignores you, she must hate you?
These distorted thoughts can really take their toll on your self-esteem. Below is a list of 10 negative ways of thinking, if you can recognise yourself having these thoughts then you can begin the process of rationalising them.
1. Personalisation
Even though it’s largely out of your control you blame yourself for a negative event that occurred ‘If I had taken more care, I never would have lost my mobile phone.’
2. Filtering
One negative happening, such as a rude comment made to you during an otherwise enjoyable evening changes your whole perspective on the evening and puts you on a downer
3. Rejecting praise
Closing off the positive such as a compliment, affectionate gesture or praise goes unnoticed, ignored or deflected; you might reply with, ‘It’s no big deal.’
4. Drawing false conclusions
You draw negative conclusions without getting your facts straight. You try and predict the future or guess what someone else is feeling ‘My sister is upset, she must be angry with me.’
5. Negative reasoning
You are sure that your negative opinion of a situation reflects reality. Such as: ‘My husband drops his socks on the floor just to aggravate me.’
6. Using the word ’should’ in your vocabulary
You adhere to being a perfectionist and following certain rules about what you ’should’ be doing. You feel useless and guilty when you can’t stick to your rules.
7. Overgeneralisation
One negative event, such as an insult from your partner or an argument with someone causes you to exaggerate the situation. For example, you might think, ‘She’s always cold’ or ‘You can’t trust anyone.’
8. Labelling
Rather than learning from a mistake and using it as an experience that has helped you grow as a person, you label yourself negatively: ‘I’m a failure.’ You do the same to other people too: ‘She’s so controlling.’
9. Magnification or minimisation
You wind yourself up so that molehill problems become mountains ‘I know I won’t be any good at it.’ Or you minimize anything that might make you feel good, such as appreciation for a kind act you did or the recognition that other people have flaws, too.
10. All or nothing
If you don’t perform with perfection, then you consider yourself a complete failure.
Negative thoughts don’t have to be a way of life, you can ‘unlearn’ self-defeating ways of thinking that pave the way toward mood disorders.
Writing things down on paper really helps. Take some time out of your day to write down a negative event, notice your thought pattern from the list above and look at then write down a different perspective with a more rational and optimistic response.
Just the act of writing gives you back some power and control over the situation and once you have recognised your negative thought pattern you are on the way to teaching yourself new patterns, positive ones!
By Izzie Knolles
*Taken from Facebook notes
Look at the pretty editorial spread from Vogue for Sex and the City the movie in dernier cri.
Long overdue, but to me it felt like SATC just ended its run yesterday.
I love the city.
The fridge at home is really not mine, it’s my parents’. If I had my way, my fridge will be full of the following:
1) Chocolates. I would love to have any kind of chocolate in my fridge. Lindt, M&Ms, kit kat, Godiva, Van Houten
2) Fruits. I like colours and I love fruits in different colours like green apples, strawberries, longans, oranges, lemons, grapes, etc etc.
3) Dried mushrooms and scallops. I am no cook, but I would prefer to throw stuff into my instant noodles, soup and porridge. Just for more texture.
4) Prawns and sotong balls. Random I know but they go well with instant noodles and plain porridge. Oh I have a thing for fried sotong balls! especially those my mum fried.
5) Juices, Yakult, soya bean milk and Meiji milk. I love fresh juices, if only I can have it everyday. Yakult is sweet and good for the intestines. Soya bean milk rich in protein good for body. And I love Meiji milk to make milkshakes with my Positrim.
6) Wine and Beer. Drinking is starting to grow on me. I like Riesling and sparkling shiraz. I also enjoy an occasional beer on extremely warm days.
Maybe one day when I learn to cook more dishes, I can start stocking up on vegetables and meat. And any more I am going to sound like an Ah-So.
Time to raid my fridge for some green apple!
My Sister’s Keeper. Have not read the book but it seems to be a moving tale. Release Date in SG unknown.
(500) Days of Summer. It’s not a love story. It’s a story about love. Opens 15 Oct in SG
Funny People. Adam Sandler rocks! Opens 24 Sep in SG
The Ugly Truth between men and women. Starring Katherine Heigl from Grey’s Anatomy. Opens 17 Sep in SG
The Proposal. Face of Creme LX, Sandra Bullock is hawt stuff. Opens 20 Aug in SG.
p.s. The Time Traveller’s Wife will be released in SG on 17 Sep.
